A Birthday Post.

So, it's been a while. Someone here has been busy. Someone here is still busy.

But, it is a cast member's birthday, so a post was necessary.
And since I am busy, this is all I have for you.

Happy Birthday KStewie!

Party hard. In one more year, RPatz won't have to buy you the alcohols anymore.
So, go.
Sit through RPatz's serenade of The Birthday Song one more time.
Force KLutz away from the xbox for a spell.
Get TLaut to put a shirt on and take you to dinner.
Play some beer pong with your favorite people.

Today is your day.

Twhite Stripes

Our dear friend RPatz was recently on Jimmy Fallon.  You can view that interview here:

In said interview, Jimmy suggested that RPatz and KStew start their own band, the "Twhite Stripes." Well, naturally, the other members of the cast had some comments to say about this idea.

AGreen: Wow, I think you two would make a great band. I mean, you have such great chemistry when you are acting together that maybe you could make something of a music group.

DFan: I call being a back up singer. I mean we sing together in The Runaways.

TLaut: And I could totally front the band. With my shirt off of course.

KStew: I don't know TLaut...

TLaut: I would look really good on a poster.

KLutz: And then we could make a Rock Band: Twhite Stripes Edition. You guys are FA-MOUS. We could make bank from a game like that.

JRath: Definitely. I mean, KLutz with your video game expertize, TLaut's good looks and my saavy ways we could market it really well.

KStew: Wouldn't we have to actually form the band first?

AGreen: Well yeah, but it shouldn't really be that much of a problem. I'm up for shopping for some ensembles for you guys. And DFan, I think that you being a back up singer would be a really good idea.

RPatz: Hey guys, you're forgetting one thing.

Everybody else: What? What's the problem, etc.

RPatz: I only know two songs...

As an added bonus, Jimmy Fallon had a new episode of "Bothered, with Robert Pattinson." And there was a very special guest on this episode:

The Valentine's Day Party

So our esteemed cast member, AGreen, decided it would be fun to throw a Valentine's Day extravaganza at The Penthouse.  Here's what ensued:

AGreen:  Okay guys, I'm serious here.  I want everyone, yes that means you too KLutz, to participate.  DFan told me she already has started on her Valentine's Day Box.

AGreen begins to mumble to herself what needs to be done before the party.

JRath:  Way to overachieve there, DFan.

KLutz:  For reals.  What are you, AGreen's little mignon now?  We thought you were cooler than that. 

DFan:  (Whispering so AGreen cannot hear the comment)  Hello - I was just trying to get her to stop talking.  She kept talking about this stupid party and so I made something up.  Anyways, I just bought mine.  Premade cards and everything.

Still keeping AGreen out of the conversation.

KLutz:  Good.  Because mine's an old video game holder.  It's red.

RPatz:  Um, I think there's a heart sticker on my guitar box.  Would that work?  Because I planned to sing a song for each of you.  So the box would be empty.

KStew:  And what'll that take?  Like six hours?  How about one song for the whole group.  

RPatz:  But didn't you guys like my Christmas CD?

Everyone: Oh yeah/it was great/loved it.

JRath:  My valentine's are great.

KLutz:  Red cups don't count.  Especially not used ones.

JRath:  Well crap.  I even sharpied the names on.  Hey where's TLaut?  I was hoping to get a game going.  So we all can use our NEW red cups.

KStew:  He's at some party for that movie he's in.  Or something.  

AGreen:  (Stops making lists to herself)  Alright.  Let's start decorating.  The first thing we need is a table for our boxes!  Oh and I made a list of what everyone else needs to do...

Everyone else starts grumbling, yet, three hours later, the party is all ready to go, just as TLaut is coming in from his party.

TLaut:  Wow guys, my movie is not good.  I'm just not in it enough.  And I'm wearing clothes the whole time.

AGreen:  TLaut, I've seen previews and a track shirt just doesn't count.  And we need your box before our soiree can start.

He hands her a t-shirt that has had the collar and sleeve openings sewed shut.  Her face turns to a grimace as a realizes that it's one of the shirts that she gave him for Christmas.

TLaut:  You like that there, AGreen?  Thought you would.  I picked the pink one and everything.

JRath:  That's awesome.  Just awesome.  

KLutz:  Awe, come on AGreen, he doesn't wear them anyway.  At least it's getting some use.

AGreen:  Okay.  Fine.  Thanks for making one at least.  RPatz really failed at this.

RPatz:  Err - mine's still a box.  And there's still the little heart sticker.

KStew:  But your guitar playing still stinks.

DFan laughs.  Agreen is clearly put out by the jokes being made at her party.

AGreen:  Does no one like my party ideas?  I though they were so clever!

TLaut:  It's not that we don't like them.  We just don't like crafts.  And boxes.  And decorating.  But we do like movies.  Who wants to go watch me on screen?  I have passes to see Valentine's Day tonight.

AGreen:  Well, I guess it is festive for the holiday...

A Penthouse Resident Celebrates a Birthday.

As many of you may know, today is our friend TLaut's birthday.
His 18th to be exact.
And when you turn 18, it is kind of a big deal.
Here we look in as the Penthouse residents celebrate the important day.

(We come in on the castmates having dinner around the dinner table. Balloons and streamers are hung on the walls and everyone is sporting their party hat (courtesy of AGreen))

Everyone: Happy Birthday TLaut!!!
AGreen: I think it is time to open presents! Here, this one is from DFan.
TLaut: Thanks DFan! (opens present) Wow lottery tickets.
DFan: Yeah, I had to have KStew buy them for me. But now you can do that yourself!
TLaut: Sweet.
AGreen: Here. Open this one from KStew.
TLaut: (opens present) A pack of cigs? I don't even smoke.
KStew: Yeah, but now you can. And I was trying to get rid of those anyway, so there you go.
TLaut: Thanks. I guess.
AGreen: Here. This one is from me.
TLaut: (opens gift) What the heck is this?
AGreen: Those are your voter registration forms! Since you turned 18 you can vote now. So I went ahead and took care of all of that for you.
TLaut: Well thanks.
KLutz: Well, RPatz, JRath, and I went in together on a gift for you. But it hasn't come in yet. So when it gets here, you can have it then.
AGreen: Aww that stinks. I hate it when packages are late in the mail.

(RPatz, JRath, and KLutz exchange smirks and hold back laughter..)

RPatz: Yeah, I don't know what it is about this American postal service you guys have here, but it's too bad that your gift didn't come in man.
AGreen: Well, I'm going to run and get the cake and ice cream.

(After AGreen leaves room, KStew turns to face the guys.)

KStew: You guys are up to something. I can tell.
JRath: I have no idea what you are talking about. Our gift was lost in the mail.
RPatz: Yeah, calm it. (**starts to snicker**)

(AGreen returns with cake. Everyone eats and heads to bed. Around 11 pm, the following takes place.)

RPatz: (shaking TLaut) TLaut! TLaut wake up!
KLutz: Yo wake up! We're going somewhere.
TLaut: What?! What the heck are you doing?
JRath: Here put these clothes on. You have to wear clothes where we're going.

(Other guys start to snicker.)

TLaut: What are you guys laughing at? Hand me some pants. And a shirt if you're making me wear clothing.

(Their car pulls up along the side of a building. As TLaut glances out the window, he spots the sign that gives away where they are.)

TLaut: Are you kidding me?! You brought me here! This is the best present ever! Why didn't you tell me before??
JRath: And ruin seeing that look on your face?
KLutz: And I think we all know that AGreen would have never allowed this if she knew we were here.
RPatz: Are you guys just going to hang out out here all day or are we actually going to go in? Cause I didn't get away from the Penthouse to just hang around outside of this joint.

After a nice night at "The Joint" the guys return to the Penthouse and their beds.

Whitney's note: Happy birthday TLaut. I hope it was celebrated in this manner. And I wish you the best of luck fending off all of the women who are now legally able to lust after you.

VD.

On the tv is a new show called The Vampire Diaries. As I watch (and loveee) the show, I find some similarities to Twilight. As do our castmates. Here they discuss.


KLutz: DFan, what are you watching on the tv there?
AGreen: It better not be anything bad. You know how I don't like you watching some of those programs.
DFan: It's The Vampire Diaries. It's about vampires. And is based on a book.
KStew: Well, that sounds familiar...
TLaut: Are there werewolves?
DFan: No. But I think they are coming. One episode kinda hinted toward it.
TLaut: Well, until there are werewolves, I'm not watching.



(Paul Wesley, aka Stefan Salvatore, aka The Hotness, comes up on screen.)




KStew: Woah! Who is that?
DFan: That's Stefan. He's the main vampire. Kinda like the Edward.
KStew: I'm not gonna lie, he's pretty hot.
RPatz: Well of course you think he's hot. He looks like me.
AGreen: What do you mean he looks like you?
RPatz: Well look at him. If I was dressed like Eddie right now, we would look like twins. The same hair. The same clothes. The same really confused look on our faces.
JRath: Well, there are some similarities.
AGreen: JRath, you are supposed to be thinking about what you did. Don't think I've forgotten.
DFan: Anyways, Stefan is kinda like Edward too. I mean, neither one drink human blood. And that's kind of it. Oh, and he loves Elena.


(Paul Wesley, The Hotness, takes the shirt off.)






KStew: Daaaaaaang. Well, there's one thing that you and him don't have in common RPatz.
TLaut: Yo, that's more like something Stefan and I have in common.
RPatz: You all can shut it.

KLutz: I just like this Damon cat. He seems cool.
AGreen: You would.

Operation Bearded Sally*

DFan, one day, comes in to The Penthouse all upset.  No one can figure out why, until KStew comes up with a great idea.

KStew:  (Going over to DFan)  DFan, what's up?

DFan:  Nothing, go away.

KStew:  Can I get you a drink?

AGreen:  DO NOT GIVE HER A DRINK.  SHE'S DISTRESSED.

KStew:  Shut it AGreen, it'll relax her.

RPatz:  Agreed.  I mean seriously, look how chill I am all the time.

DFan:  No, it's cool I don't need a drink.  But maybe a good plan to kill this girl at my school.

AGreen:  KLutz, I told you those video games would have a bad affect on DFan...

KLutz:  Whatever, she knows that it's make believe.  

DFan:  I really do.  But listen guys.  There's this girl at my school.  And she wasn't ever my friend but as soon as she found out that I was in New Moon she started nagging me to get RPatz' autograph.  I told her that I wouldn't do it, so then she starts this rumor about how you all aren't even my friends.  I tried to tell her otherwise, but now everyone except my closest friends think you all are mean to me or something.

JRath:  For real?  I mean did you tell her about all of our fun parties and stuff?  

DFan:  She just won't believe it.  AND she keeps telling everyone that her and RPatz are like besties because she's Team Edward and Edward's biggest fan and my "best friend." 

AGreen:  DFan, I'm sure this is all a misunderstanding.  Can't you just work it out politely with a school counselor or something?

KStew:  AGreen, I'm sure that DFan's school counselors are completely adequate, but dealing with crazies means war.  

TLaut:  YEAH.  Let's give her what she wants.  A convo with RPatz.  And then when she least expects it, well BREAK.  HER.  HEART.

They all go about coming up with a plan, yes, even AGreen came around.  It first involved an e-mail. 

RPatz has recently been sporting a beard, and well DFan was informed by this girl (we'll call her Sally) that she HATES beards.  So a mysterious e-mail arrives in Sally's inbox, with a note saying that if she doesn't quit bugging DFan, RPatz will grow a beard that's longer than Rip Van Winkle's.

She obviously didn't understand the reference, because she wrote back that she thought even RPatz looked hot in a beard.

Damn, they all thought.  So they came up with a better plan.

This plan first involved DFan pretending to befriend Sally (she's an actress, she can handle it) and getting her phone number.  Then this occurred, on the night of the Hope for Haiti Now Telethon.  RPatz was a member, and the rest of the gang was ready to put Operation Bearded Sally into action.  

RPatz:  (Making a phone call)  Sally?  This is RPatz calling from the Hope for Haiti Now Telethon.

Sally:  (Starts screaming upon hearing RPatz)  OMG!! I'm in love with you!!! And Edward!!!

RPatz hangs up.  Sally freaks out, and calls the number back immediately.  Someone else picks up.

TLaut:  Sally.  I seriously don't understand how you could be Team Edward, when Jacob is most definitely the better choice.  This is TLaut by the way.

Sally:  (Whining)  But where did RPatz go?  I wanted to talk to him.

TLaut:  Really?  I thought you wouldn't care because I heard that you and RPatz were, what was it?  "Besties?"

Sally:  Who told you that?

JRath and AGreen:  He heard it through one of us.

Sally:  Who's that?

KStew:  (Choosing her words wisely)  Anyway, Edward is mine.  MINE.

Sally:  (Getting nervous)  Bella?  I mean KStew?!?!?  What's going on?!?

TLaut:  You really thought that we weren't her friends?  How stupid are you? 

KLutz:  You just leave our little DFan alone.  Because we know where you are.  Right now. 

She hung up out of fear.  DFan went to school and the girl didn't bother her again.  She doesn't even plan on going to see Eclipse.  Ever.

*Her name may or may not have been changed. 

Whoops.

As you all may already know, the Eclipse script was leaked online last week. (I am not going to read it. Don't like spoilers.)
Apparently, it was a copy of JRath's script.
So some of our cast mates here wanted to share their views on the situation.

AGreen: Well, it is most unfortunate that the script to our next big hit, Eclipse, was leaked. I told JRath to make sure to put his script in a safe, secure place, but he just didn't listen to me. I even offered to hold on to it for him, but he was positive he could keep it safe. I guess next time he'll listen to me. I don't know how long it is going to take these people to learn that I am always right.


KStew: (hysterical laughter) What a loser.


DFan: I'm not going to tell you where I keep my script hidden. It's a secret.
KLutz: DFan, are you even in Eclipse?
DFan: Yes I'm in Eclipse! I'm freaking Jane! I hung out with you guys on set. Remember?
KLutz: Man, that was you?? Dude, you were freaking creeping me out. I thought you were just some random person on set.


TLaut: Well....that sucks.


RPatz: I was a little worried at first that it was my copy of the script that got out. Then I remembered that I had kept it where I kept my copy of Midnight Sun that SMeyer gave me so I could study up on Edward, so I knew it was safe. Wait.....Midnight Sun was leaked too?? Crap....


KLutz: If people are going to read it, I hope they at least like it. Emmett kicks some serious bu-tay. But really, Emmett always kicks serious bu-tay.


JRath: I have no comment on this matter....

Annnd...someone already made this: